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Posted

Six hearty (manly types!) put in at Tuck's today,

Seeking adventure, camraderie, and a touch of mayhem... with no delay!

Gentle winds, a mild temperature and a fair sky...

"Brisk pace 'tween the boisterous Miseries" was the cry!

Alas, one among us dumped, accoutrements scattered

While our remainder focused on all else that mattered.

Gathered and brave, about to press onward,

We spotted, there beached, the crimson vessel starboard.

"I shall retrieve!"... off he mustered through Neptune's breakers

Only to be also spilled like unarmed pacifist Quakers

Thoroughly flummoxed upon repeated attempts to launch

He'd nearly forgotten the plastic orb, but, of strong haunch

Blazed out fearlessly to rejoin our group

(who, needlessly said, in unison, let out a whoop).

Splashing now round Little Misery, 'cross fiery-white Bowditch Ledge

We set for Mingo Beach, the heaving rollers trying to wedge

Us from each's view; finally we slowly gathered, scouring a landing,

When one us hazarded too close, then surfing, oh free-flight! ...into quite a sanding.

Our remainder, hesitant but one,

Sought kinder refuge in a cove called Plum.

After trekking rocky Smith Point to reconnoiter

We gathered for grub amidst Helios grown brighter

We duo from Mingo managed to put in,

Soon to realize we've repeated the sin

For not only was my curvaceous bottle of tea ginger

Left behind, but it's fate is to perhaps linger

With that cursed void-vessel shaped like a (bent? straight? see other thread) finger.

Fully refreshed, the majority set on Hardy Shoal

While a pair relaxed in Misery redux as a goal

To the Gooseberries, ne'er mind the shoal 'round Pope's Head,

In hopes of seeing a colony, but nearly bonking a sleeping seal instead!

Off easterly we studied a long nervous high line of perilous detail,

Linking the Dry Breakers NNE, just for paddlers more hale!

"Around Bakers" we demurred, cascading rollers through Ledges Pilgrim and Gales

Arriving east of House and Ram Isles, did we band of males.

Gingerly (actually...not) pondering our course homeward

We saluted ourselves and pressed forward

Through the entry of the procession of breakers 'tween rocks

Suddenly stopping, jaws now agape when an eight footer cocks

Its might through our stage set so near

That, Christ, we just quickly retreated in fear.

"Around House" eventually became the common clarion,

Lest some of us be mercilessly pounded to carrion.

Threading narrowly along swell banks crossing Whaleback

Enroute to violent crashes upon House's rocks NOT scaled back

We did singularly file, ever so awed, with freshened humility

Eventually to Tuck's, joining our buds from Misery.

RIP

Bottles of Pee and Ginger

c. Black Rock

3 November 2009

Posted
Six hearty (manly types!) put in at Tuck's today,

Seeking adventure, camraderie, and a touch of mayhem... with no delay!

Gentle winds, a mild temperature and a fair sky...

"Brisk pace 'tween the boisterous Miseries" was the cry!

Alas, one among us dumped, accoutrements scattered

While our remainder focused on all else that mattered.

Gathered and brave, about to press onward,

We spotted, there beached, the crimson vessel starboard.

"I shall retrieve!"... off he mustered through Neptune's breakers

Only to be also spilled like unarmed pacifist Quakers

Thoroughly flummoxed upon repeated attempts to launch

He'd nearly forgotten the plastic orb, but, of strong haunch

Blazed out fearlessly to rejoin our group

(who, needlessly said, in unison, let out a whoop).

Splashing now round Little Misery, 'cross fiery-white Bowditch Ledge

We set for Mingo Beach, the heaving rollers trying to wedge

Us from each's view; finally we slowly gathered, scouring a landing,

When one us hazarded too close, then surfing, oh free-flight! ...into quite a sanding.

Our remainder, hesitant but one,

Sought kinder refuge in a cove called Plum.

After trekking rocky Smith Point to reconnoiter

We gathered for grub amidst Helios grown brighter

We duo from Mingo managed to put in,

Soon to realize we've repeated the sin

For not only was my curvaceous bottle of tea ginger

Left behind, but it's fate is to perhaps linger

With that cursed void-vessel shaped like a (bent? straight? see other thread) finger.

Fully refreshed, the majority set on Hardy Shoal

While a pair relaxed in Misery redux as a goal

To the Gooseberries, ne'er mind the shoal 'round Pope's Head,

In hopes of seeing a colony, but nearly bonking a sleeping seal instead!

Off easterly we studied a long nervous high line of perilous detail,

Linking the Dry Breakers NNE, just for paddlers more hale!

"Around Bakers" we demurred, cascading rollers through Ledges Pilgrim and Gales

Arriving east of House and Ram Isles, did we band of males.

Gingerly (actually...not) pondering our course homeward

We saluted ourselves and pressed forward

Through the entry of the procession of breakers 'tween rocks

Suddenly stopping, jaws now agape when an eight footer cocks

Its might through our stage set so near

That, Christ, we just quickly retreated in fear.

"Around House" eventually became the common clarion,

Lest some of us be mercilessly pounded to carrion.

Threading narrowly along swell banks crossing Whaleback

Enroute to violent crashes upon House's rocks NOT scaled back

We did singularly file, ever so awed, with freshened humility

Eventually to Tuck's, joining our buds from Misery.

RIP

Bottles of Pee and Ginger

c. Black Rock

3 November 2009

This may be one of those times where the reader may have had to be there to appreciate the above poesy. Nevertheless since this is award season I nominate Ern for the "Trip Report of the Year" award.

Posted
This may be one of those times where the reader may have had to be there to appreciate the above poesy. Nevertheless since this is award season I nominate Ern for the "Trip Report of the Year" award.

I second the nomination.

Great trip yesterday (notwithstanding the aforementioned loss). Bill, thanks for calling and organizing.

Bob

Posted

We've a bard in our midst! Who knew?? Bravo! Encore!!

I'm so moved by the retelling of our saga as to mount a tea/pee vessle rescue -- undoubtedly a first in the history of sea kayaking. Any brave lad ready and able again to venture to yon briny depth and sandy shore?

Posted

So...what is this cocktail of "pee and ginger" called, I want to know?

Hi Geoffrey,

As far as we're able to discern, the bottleS are probably resting separately, hopefully unable to share their liquid contents. After all, the ginger tea was my curvaceous bouteille's maiden wetting. However, the infamous pee bottle's certainly an old hand (!) at its...ahem...business.

Ern

Posted
So...what is this cocktail of "pee and ginger" called, I want to know?

Hi Geoffrey,

As far as we're able to discern, the bottleS are probably resting separately, hopefully unable to share their liquid contents. After all, the ginger tea was my curvaceous bouteille's maiden wetting. However, the infamous pee bottle's certainly an old hand (!) at its...ahem...business.

Ern

Ernie,

In pondering your recent foray into NSPN marketing and the infamous resulting tail-flag thread, it occurred to me that perhaps we should consider likewise branding of so-called pee bottles. These unfortunate losses at sea would at least have the benefit of spreading the good work of our organization. Unlike with the tail-flags and especially among those males of age 50+, there will be no argument as to the criticality of these devices for paddling safety and comfort!

Bob

Posted
Ernie,

In pondering your recent foray into NSPN marketing and the infamous resulting tail-flag thread, it occurred to me that perhaps we should consider likewise branding of so-called pee bottles. These unfortunate losses at sea would at least have the benefit of spreading the good work of our organization. Unlike with the tail-flags and especially among those males of age 50+, there will be no argument as to the criticality of these devices for paddling safety and comfort!

Bob

How many new members has this thread cost us ? :)

Posted
How many new members has this thread cost us ? :)

Seems benign compared to some.

I can see the marketing campaign now. Designed around the theme of "going with NSPN".

Ed Lawson

Posted
Seems benign compared to some.

I can see the marketing campaign now. Designed around the theme of "going with NSPN".

Ed Lawson

I've been in touch with the pharmaceutical company that makes Flomax. They admit that their TV ads showing men of a certain age arm paddling their kayaks are lame and would like to upgrade their marketing to feature paddlers demonstrating proper technique in kayaks. Anyone interested? They are thinking of a new theme like: "Lost that coveted pee-bottle;don't worry, Flomax has got you covered!"

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